what the fuck, robbie alomar

February 12, 2009

Read this.

If this is all true, this makes him a tremendous scumbug. Inexcusable actions. But while I was shaking my head in disgust the whole time, this part really raised an eye:

In March or early April, 2005, the Defendant, ROBERTO ALOMAR, advised the plaintiff, ILYA DALL, that he, the Defendant, was raped by two Mexican men after playing a ball game in New Mexico or a southwestern state, when he was seventeen years of age.

THIS. This sounds incredibly fishy and unbelievable. What is more believable, perhaps, is considering the possibility that Alomar may have been, oh, having sex with men and covering up part of his inclinations (remember all those Gay Met rumors, leading up to that Piazza bullshit?), leading to a vast complicated web of denial including NOT GETTING TESTED FOR HIV. This is an extreme, sad, pitiable , dangerous example of what life in the closet can entail.

Of course, that’s all projection on my part. But this enrages me. I pity Ms. Dall. I pity any sexual partner of Alomar’s. I hope Mary Pierce is fine.

And I pity Roberto Alomar himself. This is a terrible thing to have to go through. And the sad thing is, it didn’t have to be like this. I pity him, but this is inexcusable and so fucking sad.

Advertisements

oh, hell.

April 24, 2008

: LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA
/throws strikeout

: Nice job, Ollie. I’d give your performance a thumbs up, except it’s all infected!

: EWWWWWWWWW GROSS! LA LA LA LA LA LA
/hits RBI single
LOOKIT I’M BETTER THAN DELGADO!!

: Still not as good as me.

: WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH 😥
/throws eleven balls in a row

: /takes out calculator, burps silver dollars, eats baby kitten

: /hits towering shot off the wall, waddles to first, is out of breath

: NOW WAIT A GODDAMNED SECOND

: Hey!… Guys?…You gonna help me out here? I thought I was joining a winning team.

: Waaaaaiiiiiitttt…………………what did you say about me, Ollie?
/67 mph fastball for called third strike

: OMG you’re even slow to react to words?
/sighs, doubles, steals third, steals home

: Always nice to scratch out a run. That’s some good teamwork.

: What the–

: /hits batter in the head, throws wild pitch, walks five batters

: Welp, there’s another lousy start. Let’s get my guy in here.

: Oh, NO.
/gives up grand slam, pouts

: Hey! That’s my job!

: Oh don’t worry. You’ll get your chance.

: /skips under Delgado’s glove

: /rolls past Delgado

: See? Two runs just scored. Your ERA is still higher than Heilman’s.

: BUT I WANTED IT TO GO OUT OF THE STADIUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!

: Can’t win ’em all.

: I’LL SAY!

: Did you say something, Churchie?
/dives for groundball, realizes he is asleep in bed
Oh boy, sleep! That’s where I’m a viking!

[With all apologies to The Dugout.]