Earlier today the boy I’m seeing or whatever was comparing my love of the Mets to his love of America’s Next Top Model, of all things, a show I maybe have seen 10 minutes of total. I said that it didn’t seem the same considering he has contempt for the show’s participants. He emailed the following in response:
I don’t hate all of them. There are heroes and there are villains on every season, like every reality show, and the villains tend to be high-camp witches (Yankees), and the heroes tend to be unsophisticated but bright and likable (Cubs?), and the fun comes from putting vaguely ditzy girls in high-pressure situations (infield fly rule). There is fundamental injustice in Tyra Banks’ judging every week (bad ump), and it used to be that Janice Dickinson would say something hilarious and cruel at least three times a week (Marv Albert). She’s not on the show anymore.
Which is pretty good considering he knows nothing about baseball. I suppose the better analogies here would be “Eric Gagne” instead of “infield fly rule,” and since Marv Albert doesn’t do baseball, perhaps Joe Buck or Tim McCarver?