what a chokejob

When you’re up 5-0, then 7-3, to one of the worst teams in baseball, you should probably win the game, especially when one of your fans is having all-you-can-eat sushi dinner celebrating a friend’s birthday and is relying on texting to find out the score. And then your fan is all fist-pumpy and YES! about it, and settles in for ohmygodsomuchfood. But considering your recent play, your fan is like “Hm. Hope they can hold on to that lead.” Then your fan goes home and turns on the radio to find out that you lose 10-7. Said fan then throws shit at a wall.

When your starters haven’t been able to pitch past the fifth or sixth innings since Moises Alou first thought of pissing on his hands, that means your bullpen is going to be overworked. When your bullpen consists of liabilities like Mota, Show,  and Sele, that means you are going to rely too heavily on usual stalwarts Feliciano (who is totally getting Joe Smith Syndrome), Sosa, and Heilman. Which means you put your liabilities in there. And they suck. And then your overly taxed usual stalwarts try and clean up the mess. Which they won’t. Especially when your defense decides to take a collective shit on the field.

SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK SUCK. What is going on with the Mets? They’re setting themselves up for a lousy fall. If you can’t win games where you’re beating an awful team, how are you going to win games against the Phillies or Braves?

Well, at least I had a good dinner last night. I put the entire ocean in my mouth. Thankfully I didn’t choke, which is more than I can say about some people.

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