frankly, i am stunned.

Today has been a frenzy of Joe Smith v. Jorge Sosa debate in Mets land, with the overwhelming consensus from bloggers and beat writers being that young Smith’s sparkling performance deserved a place on the team while Sosa and his $2 million ineffective slider special should be cut. The presumed reality–even amongst Smith and his teammates–saw the Mets keeping Sosa and his contract in favor of Smith and his options, so as not to risk losing Sosa. This sparked lots of upset and angry opinions from Mets fans.

And to be sure, I was all set to join the fracas and portray my disgust and confusion and bile. As soon as it happened. And is it turned out, it didn’t. Glad to not add to that shitstorm.

But I’m shocked and overjoyed to see that the Mets made the right decision, that they favored performance  above money, solid youth over ruined experience, results over the hypothetical. For once, at least, we can’t complain about a front office decision.

happy birthday, john maine!

You are a total stud. In spite of this goofy-ass honky celebration dance you’re doing.

Johnny’s beautiful pitching performance yesterday was exactly what this Mets team (and its fans) needed, and the team responded in kind, putting up a 12-spot against the Dodgers. Isn’t it interesting how the bats wake up when given a dominant pitching performance? (Looking at you, rest of the rotation!)

But he wasn’t satisfied with just pitching 8 1/3 of one-run ball (which included a pitch under the chin of Douchebag Jeff Kent, leaving him sprawling). No, he got into the offensive fun as well, lunging for a Brad Penny breaking ball and blooping a 2-out, 2-run single in the fifth. What a beaut that was (the result, not the swing; boy, is he awkward-looking at the plate.)

Favorite quote from yesterday comes from the birthday boy himself: “I’ve got a batting average and Pelfrey doesn’t.”

Your move, Pelf.

this is getting old

And so am I, as I celebrated my birthday over the weekend–the Mets lost, but they bookended it with two wins in Arizona, so I felt like that was good enough. What isn’t good enough, however, is how they have been playing in Los Angeles. Now, my plan this year was to be in L.A. this week so that I could see the Mets play at Chavez Ravine, where I have not been since I was 14. Due to monetary issues that didn’t happen, but I guess there’s a silver lining here because it means that I’ve been spared witnessing the debacles of the last two nights.

So, Oliver Perez may be looking for a five-year, $60 million contract? Excuse me while I LOfuckingL. Hey Ollie, maybe you could work on making it out of the sixth once in a while first? Sad thing is, he’ll probably get it.

Of all the unbelievable things about last night, I’m not sure which one is the most mind-boggling:

• Moises Alou stealing home. Really? WHAT?!?!? Yes.
• The Mets having bases loaded with no outs in the second and not scoring another run. On second thought, this one is all too believable. Especially considering Ryan Church hit into a 1-2-3 double play. “1 2 3.” Estefan strikes again!!!!!!
• Yet another bafflingly dominant performance by Hong-Chi Kuo. This one reeks of déjà vu. But hey, at least he didn’t homer this time.

So the best we can hope for is a .500 performance on this road trip that started so well. Sorry to say, but that seems like the MO of the 2008 Mets.

wait. seriously?

This isn’t a joke?

OH MY GOD. It’s like “Meet The Mets” getting fucked by Billy Joel on a bed of synthesizers.

…

I’ve listened to it like a dozen times already, at least. My favorite part is “We’ll go nuts for every curly W.” I kind of like that line, in the “it makes me think of pubes” kind of way.

On the Kinsey scale from Paul Newman to Liberace, I give this a Rufus Wainwright.

Hat tip to Why I Hate DC, and an excellent lyrical parsing is here.