john maine needs some goddam ritalin

I’ve always thought that Oliver Perez and John Maine were two sides of the same coin, the difference being that Perez’s side is the one that usually lands facedown in shit. Both have always seemed to be in the throes of dominance before something goes spectacularly awry in one inning–walks, errors, bloop or broken-bat hits. Such was the case tonight in the second inning of the Mets’ 6-4 win in Atlanta, only making it all the more frustrating (probably to Maine the most) that he only allowed one other hit in any other inning. Which draws a major line between Perez and Maine, and why Maine will always be more of a fan favorite than his currently bullpen-residing (why is this a good idea? No really, I would like to know, since I see NO REASON for it) left-handed ADD counterpart: Maine tries to fight through his struggles, whereas Perez just throws up his hands and quits. Times like tonight’s second inning make Maine incredibly frustrating, but the fact that he shows a bit of bulldog on the mound when things don’t go his way (much like his good buddy Mike Pelfrey has shown) is commendable, especially compared with Perez, sitting out there with a group of pitchers who actually know how to get people out in a tight spot. I hope he takes notes.

Speaking of the bullpen, I’ve delayed making this proclamation because I wasn’t sure if it would take, but: Bobby Parnell, I love you. You fill the naive-country-boy-in-the-bullpen void that was created when Joe Smith was traded. Except with less personality, but who cares when he’s shown remarkable poise and great velocity and movement on his pitches. Walking the leadoff man in the seventh inning was not so good, but he came back to get the very next batter to hit into a double play. Very Joe Smith-like. I think his performances out of the pen have gone unnoticed because of JJ Putz and Frankie Rodriguez, but I would even put him above Putz as far as pitchers I feel comfortable seeing coming out of the bullpen. He has quietly been a dependable workhorse, and I think is by far our best bridge to the Putz-Rodriguez closeout.

Back-to-back two run homers by Carlos Beltran and David Wright (Beltran included another two-run shot an inning later) were pretty nice too, especially considering I thought Javier Vasquez was about to throw a no-hitter. A nice birthday present, even if it was a day late. I’ll take it.

OMIR GOD

Dear Brian,

Hey, how’s the back? You know, you shouldn’t try to rush things. Just make sure you have plenty of rest. Oh, and don’t you have a new baby? I’m sure you want to spend a lot of time with him, and help out your wife with feedings and changings. I mean, your wife has a kid and then you jaunt all over the country playing baseball?! Ludicrous! Little Kalin (uh, nice name) will benefit from having both mom and dad around.

Oh, and can you tell Ramon that it’s been nice knowing him?

xoxox,

the mets would be terrible hunters

stupid IM conversation of the day

Stan: Is Oliver Perez’s weight symbolic of his attitude after signing a fat three-year, $36 million contract? Will John Maine be the pitcher we remember from before his shoulder injury last year? Is this the year Mike Pelfrey matures?
STOP ASKING SO MANY QUESTIONS JULIA STILES
me: where is this
Stan: the damn wall street journal
me: lol
Stan: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123992851955927591.html
Julia Stiles is an actress and a Mets fan living in New York. She blogs at www.juliastilesblog.com
me: oh good
Stan: she’ll be like your alyssa milano
me: SHE IS NOT HAVING SEX WITH BOBBY PARNELL ON MY WATCH
Stan: i don’t think bobby parnell is her stile

In all sincerity, I’ve seen Julia Stiles at Mets games before and she seems like a nice girl and much more of a baseball nerd than Milano (in my mind). Also, she’ll always have a place in my heart for being in a movie that has “You know, these guys are no Bikini Kill or Raincoats, but they’re not bad” as a line of dialogue.

Also, for some reason, I have listened to Bikini Kill’s discography this week, for the first time since college. I DON’T KNOW WHY.

first game at citi field

It’s gonna take a while before I stop calling it “Shea,” which I did at least three times today. But thanks to the graciousness of Coop, I got to go to my first game at Citi Field, and thankfully, see the first ever Mets win at the new ballpark. A solid outing from Oliver Perez who, despite Coop’s and my repeated shouts of “Don’t do it Ollie!” decided to show off his good side tonight. Which basically means he’ll be terrible next time out. And that wacky inning where Castillo and Reyes scored on wild pitches and errors was pretty thrilling even if I could not believe what exactly had happened.

And I got to experience my first home run by a Met in Citi Field as well, when Carlos Delgado went yard. I say “experience” and not “see,” because it was at this exact moment some Eurotrash young’uns decided they needed to leave the ballpark, blocking our view. Coop and I were able to laugh it off by being xenophobic and making jokes at their expense in some kind of Slavic accent. “Vy do zey call eet a humron? Vat eef I vanto valk hum?” You had to be there, I guess. Always a good un-PC time with the Coop.

It’s gonna take some time before this place feels like home. It’s lovely and sometimes breathtaking, but it feels so sterile and pristine that it almost makes me feel bad for being drunk and vulgar, like I’m yelling in a museum. I imagine it’s going to take a few dozen games before I know where everything is, but at least I know that Shake Shack (line was too long, boo) and Box Frites (yum!) are right next to each other.

The view from Coop’s seats in the Promenade. I don’t remember ever feeling so ON TOP of the field at Shea; here it felt like almost a completely vertical downward view whereas Shea’s views seemed a bit more expansive and theatrical. I kept feeling like I was missing some of the action, and constantly had to reorient where the scoreboards were. I don’t think I will master this until I’ve been here a few times.

I bought a Daniel Murphy shirt in medium because that was the smallest size they had THANKS A LOT YOU GUYS, which prompted a new meme (see: MARLON I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE YOU!, haha THAT’S a little out of date now, eh?) whenever he came up to bat: “C’mon Murph! I’m wearing your shirt!”

Takin’ care of business. How I’ve missed hearing that (you know what I didn’t miss though? SWEET FUCKING CAROLINE, which everyone booed, with good reason).